Superman

SUPRAH MAN. It's that guy... You know the one. No not that one. The other other one. With the bald-archnemesis? No? What did you live under a rock or something?

In legal terms, this is a parody, so that lawyer-happy triggermen at DC don't totally sue us for everything we have and shut down Bay12 to boot.

At anyrate, the so-called "Man of Steel" is made of indestructium ( but not Adamantium, because Marvel uses that stuff. ) He is from SPAAAACE and as a result, whenever he sneezes, the city explodes. Why all aliens ever have super powers is anybody's guess. Something to do with the sun and the lower gravity and evolution or something. Don't try to explain it cos it's a waste of time.

What Powers Does He Have?
ALL OF THEM.

Is He Cooler Than Batman
NEVER

Arrival in Cheesistan
He arrived in Cheesistan during a meteor shower called down by a hypersonic shout. So far he's a baby and has no accomplishments to his name. Beirus has adopted him and is going to train him to have even more super-powers, so everyone get to drinking your Kryptonite smoothies or we're all screwed. ( Not like the whole country doesn't get blown up on a daily basis anyway. )